Feeling Excluded

There are many ways in which one can feel excluded. This may be in a family situation, friendships, relationships, or even something as simple as a group assignment. In a family situation, the person may feel left out of a conversation. If someone is not their age, they may be kind of alone because they do not know who to talk to, so they feel a little left out. In relationships, if their partner does not invite them to a social gathering or is always going out with friends, it may seem like the person is being excluded from their significant other. Most of the time, however, people feel excluded in friendships. Friendships can be very tricky. A few examples: Not being invited to a party when everyone else is going; Being the person left behind when the sidewalk or hallway is too small for a group of three; When everybody else knows something that you have not been told about.
A persons reaction to these things vary on their personality. Some may see it as not a big deal, whereas others can get very depressed and shut themselves out. They could see it as 'Oh well, we do not really hang out that much anyway' or 'Maybe they do not feel like we have a close relationship'. However, when it becomes a bigger deal, such as in an intimate relationship, people may get very upset. They may think someone is going to leave them or like they are becoming too much to handle. It all depends on the person, relationship with the other person, and the situation. Therefore, the outcome is unpredictable.

Desperate Measure

It was the summer of '14 and the heat outside was excruciating. The sun was slowly starting to set and people were clearing out of the field. I scrolled through my phone, waiting for my mom to call me saying she had arrived to pick me up. My legs were so sore from the numerous concerts I had attended through out the day. It was my first time at Warped Tour, so I did was much as I could. I was getting eager and more tired as the hour passed, calling my mom many times trying to see where she was. After about three hours of sitting in the patch of grass,  I figured that she had forgot about me and that I would have to find another way home. I got up with a groan and began walking around, looking for someone who looked nice enough to drive me home. After an hour of walking, I was lost. It was dark out now, so the only lights were the ones cast by workers taking down the numerous stages. I found a gate that lead to a gravel path. I pushed through to find about 30 giant busses, all different sizes and colors. As I weaved through them, I felt like someone was following me. I looked behind me to see a tall man standing a good 50 feet away. I asked who he was and he replied "My names Austin. Lead singer from Of Mice & Men. I saw you walking around figured you were lost." I told him about my mom leaving me and he told me that I could stay with him and the band through out the tour. I gladly accepted.
Through out the days, the five boys bought me clothes and necessities and I was able to go backstage at every concert. After the tour was over, I ended marrying Austin and we lived happily ever after.
(This is 100% TRUE)

Sophomore year can be tough, especially in Early College. The future comes quicker and adulthood comes sooner to us students, and we must prepare. A large part of our preparation comes from 10th grade. We are preparing to go from high school to the responsibility of college and we must learn to strengthen our weaknesses in order to succeed. I have pinpointed my wreak spots and embraced what I have learned. Throughout 10th grade, I have had struggles and accomplishments that have helped guide me to my aspirations.

Some Things Just Don't Click.

I am pretty prepared for my OGTs but the one subject I am not sure I will do good on is the history OGT. I have never been good at history, even in elementary school. Very few lessons would come easy for me and it made me struggle. I have never been able to memorize the hundreds of words and dates and who-did-what. My mind jut does not like to organize all of these events. I get dates mixed up and I forget who lead what war and I do not remember groups or who was in that group. I think I could do good on this test if I get some extra help or have someone explain it to me in a different way. I think that if someone says these in a different way, then it may click with me. Some things just do not click in my head, and history is definitely one of them.

Alone And Cold.... But I Like It

On cold days like this, I like to wrap myself in about three thick, insulated comforters. I lay on my couch with my freshly brewed hot cocoa, sipping it slowly as The warmth spreads through out my body. I watch my favorite show, American Horror Story, no matter if the episode is new or old. On some day, I sit on my couch for hours rewatching a season. Sometimes I will just sit there with my headphones pushed in to my ears and listen to something soft or slow by my favorite bands, such as The a Calm by Of Mice & Men, Lullabies by All Time Low, or Beside You by Mariana's Trench. It helps me relax my body and forget the cold air and snow falling from the the world above me and, for once, my mind is at ease.

Weekend Catastrophe

One unusual thing I did this weekend was dye my hair way too blonde. I have dyed my hair blonde before, but it has never been as bright and radiant as it is now. I was actually kind of scared when I washed the hair dye out because it looked a little orange, but it was only because it was wet. When I blow dried it to make sure it turned out alright, I found out that it was way more blonde than I had intended. Some strands of my hair even looked white. Thankfully, now that I have let it set in for a few days, it is not as light as it was the day I dyed it. I am still not very fond of my hair, but it is better than it was almost a week ago.

Social Anxiety

If I could change one thing in the world, it would have to be how people view me without understanding my background. They often get the wrong impression of me because I have Social Anxiety. It often changed my mood around people I do not know well or have never met and I tend to get really quiet, mad, or very annoying. I can get annoying because I am really nervous and I end up rambling about my life or just being flat out wired. I do not do it intentionally, though. My social anxiety masks who i really am, and because first impressions count, I tend to make the wrong ones. For the people that stick around, however, we can become really great friends once I get to know the person. I am really not that bad of a person, but most people do not give me a second chance. Because of this, I have been bullied for years, which is slowly making my disorder worse and worse.